


In the Grotto

by completelyhopeless



Series: Puzzle Pieces of Us [17]
Category: Young Justice (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst, Canonical Character Death, Comment Fic, Community: comment_fic, Gen, during five year gap
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-16
Updated: 2015-02-16
Packaged: 2018-03-13 08:29:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 798
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3374708
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/completelyhopeless/pseuds/completelyhopeless
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dick stands down in the grotto, looking at the memorial, lost in guilt and blame.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In the Grotto

**Author's Note:**

> When I posted the first of these, I said this prompt: _[Young Justice, any, (any time between the first two seasons) Wally isn't the first one they lost](http://comment-fic.livejournal.com/593598.html?thread=82892478#t82892478)_ would probably get filled en route to [this prompt.](http://comment-fic.livejournal.com/593598.html?thread=82873790#t82873790)
> 
> Well, it did because after I finished the first of these, this one just... came, so I wrote. I'm not arguing with that because after days of being sick and a few incidents of wanting to cry and delete fic and universes, I am just glad to write anything.
> 
> And apparently today is "song lyric stuff" day because I named the series with one and then I couldn't help naming this after "In the Ghetto" by Elvis even though I don't like that song. I don't know. I'm just going with it.

* * *

Dick stared at the image, sickness twisting in his gut. If he made it through this ceremony without puking or screaming, he'd be doing good. Crying was acceptable, would be reasonable and logical under the circumstances. The team had suffered a loss. The team had suffered its _first_ loss.

And, dully, sickly, constantly, all Dick could think was that it should have been him.

He was Robin. That was his name. His costume. He was the one that had been by Batman's side, he was the one that had earned all of Joker's anger, who had been the first “boy blunder.”

He was the one who had encouraged Bruce to take Jason on as the second Robin.

He was the one who'd left before Jason was trained.

He was the one who should be dead.

* * *

_“Are you sure you don't want it back?” Jason asked, sounding nervous. “Really sure?”_

_“The costume? Relax, Little Wing. It wouldn't fit me anymore,” Dick said, forcing yet another smile. All of them were forced these days. He didn't remember when the last real time he'd smiled when it wasn't fake. Same with the last time he'd slept without a nightmare or closed his eyes without seeing something horrible._

_“You know what I meant,” Jason said. “Are you really sure you don't want to be Robin anymore?”_

_“When the little punk looks so cute in the uniform?”_

_Jason reached out to hit him, and Dick dodged only to hit the wall with his back and flare up the worst of his still healing wounds. That was a mistake. A big one. “Stop it, Dick. This isn't funny. It's not a joke, damn it. It's...”_

_“Robin is the best thing that ever happened to you.”_

_Jason started to say something else, probably something that would have made Alfred sigh and Bruce frown, the kind of words that would make sailors blush, but he bit it down to one word.“Yes.”_

_Dick let out a breath. He put a hand on Jason's shoulder. “Like I already said, relax.”_

_“Relax? How am I supposed to relax? You're back now. You're going to be Robin again.”_

_“I can't be Robin anymore. I—”_ I should _never_ have gone undercover _“—I outgrew it, you know? Can't be the Boy Wonder forever.”_

_“You're not even eighteen yet.” Jason snorted. “You don't expect me to believe that, do you?”_

_“Like you want to wear _that_ costume for the rest of your life.”_

_Jason frowned, looking down at the red, black, and yellow. “You might be right. This time. Only this once, though.”_

_Dick laughed, and this time it was genuine. “Come on, Jaybird. Let's get out of these suits and go have some of Alfred's cookies.”_

* * *

“Rob—I mean, Nightwing,” Wally said, shifting anxiously behind him. “You... okay?”

Dick let out a noise that was somewhere between laughter and a sob. “Okay, Wally? How is _any_ of this okay? That was supposed to be me out there.”

“Uh, okay, so how do you figure that?”

“Did you or did you not just almost call me Robin?”

“Point,” Wally said, letting out a sigh. He put a hand on Dick's arm, but Dick jerked away from him. He didn't want to be touched right now. “You going to leave the grotto any time tonight?”

“No.”

“This isn't your fault. You are not the one that set that bomb. You are not the one that used that crow bar. You did not kill him. The Joker did.”

Dick knew that, but he couldn't accept it. “Did you train him?”

“Well, I trained with him on the team but—that's not what you meant.” Wally shook his head. “No, I didn't train him. I'm not Batman. I'm not... you. Come on. You can't blame yourself for that. You worked that kid hard after you got back, and he was a good fighter even before you came back. He earned his place on the team.”

“Did you put him in that suit?”

“No, Batman did and—Oh, Dick. Damn it. You didn't. You—”

“I did. I pushed Batman to take Jason in because I knew I was going on that mission. I wanted to know things here would be okay while I was gone. That Batman wouldn't be alone. That...” Dick lowered his head. “I gave him the suit.”

Wally nodded. “I... There anything I can—”

“I think I just want to be alone right now.”

“I don't think that's such a good—-”

“Wally, please.”

The speedster held up his hands. “Fine, fine. I'm going. Just... let me know if you need anything.”

Dick nodded, but he knew he wouldn't ask. He knew he wouldn't move. It would be a long time before he would feel anything close to asterous again, if he ever did.


End file.
